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Post by melodiccolor on Thu Nov 11, 2010 9:20 pm

Paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect.

I got a whole list of these from Hester; going to list one a day. Have fun! popcorn What a Face

Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

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Post by BlueTopaz on Fri Nov 12, 2010 4:46 am

Oh interesting! I am going to try to make some up.
(When I get time, dammit)

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Post by melodiccolor on Fri Nov 12, 2010 8:40 pm

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

More to come... Suspect

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Absurdity is one of the great joys of life.

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Post by frmthhrt on Sat Nov 13, 2010 12:33 am

lol...I was going to post that line the other day...
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Post by melodiccolor on Sat Nov 13, 2010 9:09 pm

Today's quote:

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

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Absurdity is one of the great joys of life.

All you need for a rich life is to see more.
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Post by BlueTopaz on Sun Nov 14, 2010 7:15 am

Working so many hours I have no time to post or chat or do any of the things I need to do. I shouldn't be so lazy. Neutral

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"An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come."
- Victor Hugo
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Post by BlueTopaz on Sun Nov 14, 2010 7:22 am

Here's one I love... not sure if it is one or not... I think so

Jesus loves you, but the rest of us think you're an asshole.

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"An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come."
- Victor Hugo
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Post by frmthhrt on Sun Nov 14, 2010 12:57 pm

Very Happy
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Post by melodiccolor on Sun Nov 14, 2010 5:02 pm

Yep, that counts.

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Post by melodiccolor on Sun Nov 14, 2010 8:54 pm

Today's installment:

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

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Post by melodiccolor on Mon Nov 15, 2010 4:46 pm

So true:

We never really grow up; we only learn how to act in public.

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Post by melodiccolor on Sun Nov 21, 2010 8:23 pm

War does not determine who is right -- only who is left.

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Absurdity is one of the great joys of life.

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Post by melodiccolor on Sat Dec 11, 2010 9:01 pm

Oh well, here's the rest on them in one fell swoop:

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening,' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. My desk is a work station.

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

Some people are like Slinkies ... not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.

Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.

I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted pay checks.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR."

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut and still think they are sexy.

Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?

Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.

Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were.

Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.

Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.

There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.

I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

You're never too old to learn something stupid.

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.



AND THIS ONE ATTRIBUTED TO GROUCHO MARX...........

"TIME FLYS LIKE AN ARROW; FRUIT FLIES LIKE A BANANA"



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Absurdity is one of the great joys of life.

All you need for a rich life is to see more.
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