Those darn labels

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default Those darn labels

Post by melodiccolor on Tue Apr 06, 2010 2:01 am

There have been a lot of comments about hating to be labeled. It got me thinking; why do so many of you hate any labels at all? They do serve a useful purpose, namely helping to identify those characteristics we share with other groups of people. This helps us find those whom we can share with in a deeper way. They by no means describe who we are, just what parts are in common. For example, I am HSP, INFJ, culturally jewish and a sci fi fan. OK, does that mean you know all about me now, who I am as a person? Of course not; just a few things about me.

I think the problem is that so many people like to use those labels to say, yes, I do know all about you now and you are (pick one:) dismissable as of no importance or you are like me so better than the rest. It is like saying all X are inferior or all Y are superior. HSPs are superior because X. HSPs are inferior because we deal with Y. The truth is we are neither, just a group of people who happen to be wired differently than the rest of humanity. It by no means describes who we are, just that we share that trait.

The same for personality types, cultures, race, education level, age, etc. In each group, certain common things are there, but not a whole person. Someone can add a thousand labels to anyone and still not describe who a person is. We are all unique. That is a given. Labels just help us find one another when used properly and that is it. If you accept that, is having a lable so bad?


Last edited by melodiccolor on Tue Apr 06, 2010 2:15 am; edited 1 time in total

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default Re: Those darn labels

Post by Nucky on Tue Apr 06, 2010 2:11 am

I think that, while certain stereotypes applied to certain labels aren't entirely true, often they aren't entirely UNtrue either. For example, based on my experiences over the past couple years compared to my experiences before that, I know that I'm much more likely to "click" with people who are HSP than those who aren't. But, at the same time, I know that there are some truly vile people who are HSP, and many wonderful people worth getting to know who aren't HSP at all.

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Post by Bluedream on Tue Apr 06, 2010 8:33 am

Yes...all of what's been said is true. We are humans firstly. Everyone is unique and has there own special purpose...place...that which may never be quite apparent... whether from 'online contact' or personal life. In that thought I don't suppose it's fair to assume much of anything as to how we view others or 'labels'. I also have to believe firstly that most people really are good at heart and mean well...and not just 'sensitive folk'. That is important!!!
I've just started feeling lately as if some see their particular 'label' as a crutch to perhaps lean on too much. For some reason or other that thought has been bothering me...and I did not wish to succumb to that.
So...I feel much more free not using it much.
I suppose for many who have just discovered 'who they are', in terms of personality 'labels',they feel safer within those constraints. [for lack of a better term] I wish to move beyond those bounderies. I'd like to just say 'that's me' and feel nothing else need be added. Unless, of course, there be deeper discussion to include other things.
my 02...
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Post by Pixie1970 on Tue Apr 06, 2010 9:09 am

Gloria says it all for me! Very Happy



A gay anthem it may be famous for but to quote a comment on this video..it's

a perfect anthem for anyone who's felt out of place..


Very good song for doing the cleaning to! thumbsup

Turn the volume up people and flick those dusters! Extra Happy
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default Re: Those darn labels

Post by Pixie1970 on Tue Apr 06, 2010 9:11 am

You dancin yet? dancing big grin

I think the poster of the video got a line wrong though....should be "As good as YOU"!! No matter...good effort anyways lol cheers


Last edited by Pixie1970 on Tue Apr 06, 2010 9:15 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Pointing out a lyrical mishtake LOL)
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default Re: Those darn labels

Post by melodiccolor on Tue Apr 06, 2010 3:35 pm

Blue Dream, this is true. People can use labels to pigeon hole and limit themselves as easily as they can do others. Good point on another way to misuse a label.

It is not the labels themselves that are bad, just how they can be misapplied.

And Pixie, I so agree with the sentiments of that song!

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default Re: Those darn labels

Post by jaded on Tue Apr 06, 2010 8:50 pm

But, at the same time, I know that there are some truly vile people who are HSP, and many wonderful people worth getting to know who aren't HSP at all.

AMEN TO THAT & i LEARNED THE HARD WAY
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Post by edie on Thu Sep 02, 2010 4:08 am

oh boy, that still does not clear things up for me lol. if we are not the lables then who are you? if careing and a car lover is a label, then what defines "who you are" its like a vast unspoken thing that is under that. has no words and no definition. so then how can you know really who you are?
what is that? i cant understand this concept.

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Post by BlueTopaz on Thu Sep 02, 2010 4:14 am

edie, It's just that label limit us so much. We are the label but only one facet of us. And yes, you are exactly right, there IS a
vast unspoken thing that is under that. has no words and no definition
But you can and do know it because that vast unspoken thing (and that describes it so well) is exactly the same in all of us. To know it you need only look within, under what you call your mind and personality and past and what you think makes up what you are, in other words, all those labels.
It is what links us all, it is what gives you your inspiration, it is the life force that is at the core of "life".

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default Re: Those darn labels

Post by Nucky on Thu Sep 02, 2010 4:22 am

edie wrote:oh boy, that still does not clear things up for me lol. if we are not the lables then who are you? if careing and a car lover is a label, then what defines "who you are" its like a vast unspoken thing that is under that. has no words and no definition. so then how can you know really who you are?
what is that? i cant understand this concept.

Exactly. This is why I hate labels so much.

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default Re: Those darn labels

Post by frmthhrt on Sun Oct 10, 2010 4:57 pm

My issue is that some person somewhere dreamed up their pet system and pet labels, and rated everything on their pet scale...some of them are better researched than others, and yes I can relate to some of them, but often these are narrow definitions and miss so much of the bigger picture, that it is obvious they are flawed.
Just because I fit into the HSP or INTP/ INFP, that does not define me (as others have pointed out). If I tried to list all my labels, it would take a whole page...but I can change in seconds and will be something else. LOL
"TMA" and Scanners were just too over the top for me. I don't believe you can have too many aptitudes, and scanning implies not really taking time to understand something...so I can't buy either description, because I research and learn things very well, and am often more valuable in my job(s) because I have a broader range of knowledge than most of my peers.
Some labels do work...HSP seems quite accurate to me, so that one I will wear.
I heard a woman in a bookstore applying a description of a certain kind of child to her daughter, with some fancy name for her "condition", when all the author had done was come up with another way of describing HSP. The parent was eating this up as the answer to all her daughter's problems, and I was hoping for a chance to mention HSP to her, but the rest of their party showed up, and they left before I could say anything.
It seems like every up and coming psychologist wants to invent a new system for categorising people, and carve out their own little niche of importance and fame doing so...and don't even get me started on certain famous self-help gurus out there, supposedly coming up with all the answers to the secrets of the universe, and building a financial empire based on their "system". Pretty much any sci-fi author could do the same (and some have). LOL
I don't want to throw the baby out with the bath water, because there are some very good observations in some of the labeling systems. The point is we still have to think for ourselves, weave the new bits of insight into what we have discovered, and just be ourselves, maybe with a bit better understanding of what makes us tick.
I am just me.
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default Re: Those darn labels

Post by Alethia on Sun Oct 10, 2010 6:05 pm

frmthhrt wrote: My issue is that some person somewhere dreamed up their pet system and pet labels, and rated everything on their pet scale...some of them are better researched than others, and yes I can relate to some of them, but often these are narrow definitions and miss so much of the bigger picture, that it is obvious they are flawed.
Just because I fit into the HSP or INTP/ INFP, that does not define me (as others have pointed out). If I tried to list all my labels, it would take a whole page...but I can change in seconds and will be something else. LOL
"TMA" and Scanners were just too over the top for me. I don't believe you can have too many aptitudes, and scanning implies not really taking time to understand something...so I can't buy either description, because I research and learn things very well, and am often more valuable in my job(s) because I have a broader range of knowledge than most of my peers.
Some labels do work...HSP seems quite accurate to me, so that one I will wear.
I heard a woman in a bookstore applying a description of a certain kind of child to her daughter, with some fancy name for her "condition", when all the author had done was come up with another way of describing HSP. The parent was eating this up as the answer to all her daughter's problems, and I was hoping for a chance to mention HSP to her, but the rest of their party showed up, and they left before I could say anything.
It seems like every up and coming psychologist wants to invent a new system for categorising people, and carve out their own little niche of importance and fame doing so...and don't even get me started on certain famous self-help gurus out there, supposedly coming up with all the answers to the secrets of the universe, and building a financial empire based on their "system". Pretty much any sci-fi author could do the same (and some have). LOL
I don't want to throw the baby out with the bath water, because there are some very good observations in some of the labeling systems. The point is we still have to think for ourselves, weave the new bits of insight into what we have discovered, and just be ourselves, maybe with a bit better understanding of what makes us tick.
I am just me.

Me too..I mean I am not you..I am me..LOL!!

This takes me back to a space of darkness a while back........I remember having to face some deep fears......my world seemed in disarray..confusion running rampant.........didnt know what I wanted out of life........and I remember a friend simply holding my hands and she asked me "What do you want?".........I looked at her through my tears.......and said "I just want to be me"!!
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default Re: Those darn labels

Post by Samt03 on Sat Feb 23, 2013 9:47 pm

(Fusing this into here, if parts make no sense now sorry):

I know almost everyone here loves the MBTI, personally I hate it. Here's why:
By typing people we're limiting themselves, and ourselves as well. We say your this type so that's why you think that way. But why? Is it an excuse now so that someone can act some way with no repercussions. You're the type that should act that way so we expect you to, and we wont be surprised when you do?

Saying someone is YXZ type, doesn't that put them into a box? Oh your type does this stuff, likes this stuff. It's just another label for people. Yes we use HSP as a label as well, but how many can you apply before someone suffocates. You need to act one way cause your hsp, but keep in mind your type and act that way too.

By typing people are we forcing them to be in that box, act that way, even if it is subconscious?

I'm homosapien>human>American>Female>Southern>Caucasian>married>hsp> how many more labels need to be applied to me?

Does my personality type really change who I am? Isn't the sum of my past experiences, what I've learned and gained from them make me who I am, not some silly guide that says I should act that way?

I fail the personality test every time I take it. I don't type the way that fits me, I don't even type the same way every time.

Why?

Because situations in my past have forced me to not fit into any box, to react differently then someone else like me should. Had I not had the past I had would I react differently? Probably. But I've got scars that make me think oddly in some ways. I've got fears that make me consider things others don't.

How then can the MBTI help me? Can it really? Can INFJ be applied to me then if I'm not like other INFJ's? (I think that's what type mel said I seemed to be?)

Is the MBTI flawed then in this aspect? It doesn't take into account people may react outside of the 'box' so to say, based upon their past, yet people are still expected to think and act that way.
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Post by Zen on Sat Feb 23, 2013 9:59 pm

I dislike the way MBTI is used for social application. It's concept is ok but the way it's used I don't agree with most the time and the general attitude.
I don't like when it's used to over compensate for inability to understand people or relationships with people.
I also don't like when it's used with a rank basis and so forth.

I don't think it's about labels, it's about identity.
Labels can either be a threat for identity or a tool for identity.
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default Re: Those darn labels

Post by Dreamspace on Sun Feb 24, 2013 12:33 pm

I can't even begin to fathom how somebody's sense of identity could be so weak that a label could influence their behaviors or self-image. You should already know yourself well enough to have a very firm identity, and with that image in mind you should be able to find a label which best describes it. If it turned out my personality type was ESFJ instead of INTP, what would I learn about myself? Absolutely nothing the point is that I learned more about a taxonomic system to better classify what I already know.

If you are in a situation where you find yourself questioning who it is you are because of MBTI, I would say the system was a godsend because now it's got you actually bothering to examine yourself and get in touch with who you are. It's unacceptable to be so desperately lacking in self-awareness.

Edit:

Another thing I always notice about people is that they always project in weird ways, especially when it comes to motives. The Jungian theory and even the watered-down, simplified MBTI system derived from it is one method of understanding other people. For example, there is stigma here against people who think in terms of Introverted Thinking, and they are accused of being condescending toward others. The problem with that is that when a person is thinking in these terms, the requisite interpersonal considerations to be condescending are going to be pushed far from their mind. In fact, I would go so far as to say that mindset is the least capable of being condescending, even if it can be critical.
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Post by Samt03 on Sun Feb 24, 2013 4:05 pm

Dreamspace wrote:I can't even begin to fathom how somebody's sense of identity could be so weak that a label could influence their behaviors or self-image. You should already know yourself well enough to have a very firm identity, and with that image in mind you should be able to find a label which best describes it. If it turned out my personality type was ESFJ instead of INTP, what would I learn about myself? Absolutely nothing the point is that I learned more about a taxonomic system to better classify what I already know.
Easy, because when everyone else is like 'my type is this' and you're in a chat with them and you DON'T know your type you feel like a freak, a weirdo, like something is wrong with you.

It's like being part of a group, yet still being cut out cause you don't have the right shoes or hat or ticket or whatever to get into an exclusive club.

A lot of focus is made on the types, so because I don't type at all I must be broke? I can't stick that label on me, cause one doesn't exist for me. Almost like Data, trying to fit in with humans, but never really being one.

You probably totally don't get what I'm saying.

I don't NEED to know my mbti thingy, but without knowing it I can never take part in this "hey I'm this type" club.
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default Re: Those darn labels

Post by Patwidge on Fri Aug 15, 2014 3:58 pm

As Zen was suggesting, labels are strongly connected to our sense of identity.
The hardest thing is to define ourself. There are so many answers to "Who are you?". You can say your name, where you come from, or what you like/dislike.
In a sense, labels are comforting. Personality and identity are endless topics. And when you don't know who you are, it can be frightening! When you claim you are American or a cat lover, you are not you "by yourself" anymore; you include yourself in those groups. At least, this is one use of labels.
I agree though that the problem is that people (mis)use those to their advantage in a very restrictive way.
I think that is more or less what Sam was trying to say.
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